Ashes to Ashes, series two, episode one.
Writer: Ashley Pharoah
Director: Catherine Morshead

xxxx

Hospital room. We're viewing it from the point of view of the person lying in the bed. There's a television on the wall, hospital drugs and an iPod on the table beside the bed. In the background is the sound of a ventilator and bleeping monitors. Two nurses are attending to the patient.

NEWSREADER on TV:
Fears grow for the safety of Detective Inspector Alex Drake, who's been missing since 10 o'clock this morning. The police officer was last seen driving away from the South Bank after a failed attempt to apprehend a gunman. The police have named the gunman...

NURSE 1:
She's dead for sure.

NEWSREADER on TV:
...as Arthur Layton and have described him as armed and extremely dangerous. The search for Detective Inspector Drake continues with police releasing a photofit of the suspect. They ask...

NURSE 2:
This bloke'll be joining her by the end of the day. Bet a fiver on it.

NEWSREADER on TV:
... that anyone who has seen Arthur Layton in the South Bank area to call...

NURSE 1:
Shhhh. He might be able to hear you.

NEWSREADER on TV:
It's feared that he could be holding DI Drake as a hostage. Alex Drake has a twelve year old...

NURSE 2 switches channels to 'The Weakest Link'

NURSE 2:
Cool.

ANN ROBINSON on TV:
Voting over, it's time to reveal who you think is the weakest link.

NURSE 1:
I wonder where she is.



Shadows and torchlight. ALEX, GENE, RAY and CHRIS are in some sewers...

MUSIC: 'The Lunatics (Are Taking Over The Asylum)' by Fun Boy Three

# Aaaa. Aaa. Aaa. Aaa.
# I see a clinic full of cynics #

GENE:
This better be kosher, Bolly. If I get shit on my boots...

ALEX:
You won't do. I spoke to the Water Board. Tunnel 96 hasn't been used since the turn of the century. According to this floor plan, there's an interior drain that drops right down into this tunnel.

# The lunatics have taken over the asylum
# The lunatics have... #

CHRIS stops and shines his torch on a sign that clearly says 'Tunnel 69'

CHRIS:
What number tunnel's this?

ALEX:
96. Why?

CHRIS:
Not 69?

GENE:
I'm sure DI Drake knows what a 69 is.

CHRIS:
What's that noise?

ALEX:
I must have read it wrong.

GENE:
Might be your time on this earth is coming to a close, DI Drake.

ALEX:
Well run!

They run. CHRIS falls and sees what's coming.

CHRIS:
Oh shit!



ALEX's flat. She's sitting down to clean GENE's boots, the television on in the background.

PETER SNOW on TV:
...Harrier jump jet fighters.

ALEX:
69, 96. It's an easy mistake to make.

PETER SNOW on TV:
...only airborne air defence the Task Force will have when it's off the Falklands. Some people had driven down from the Midlands and the North to see Britain's fleet set off. It was lead, with an unhappy irony...

ALEX prises a drawing pin from the sole of one boot and contemplates it.

PETER SNOW on TV:
...by the ship that the Defence Secretary is to sell to Australia next year. Invincible is the Navy's brand new Harrier Carrier.

The television changes channels to reveal MRS MCCLUSKEY from Grange Hill talking to MOLLY.

MRS MCCLUSKEY on TV:
Molly, this just isn't the sort of behaviour I expect from you. Now come on, Molly...

ALEX:
Molly.

ALEX makes straight for the television, kneeling right up close to the screen.

MRS MCCLUSKEY on TV:
...you're going to have to do better than that. We want to know why you locked yourself in the toilet.

MOLLY on TV:
Tucker said my mum was dead.

ALEX:
I'm not dead, Molly. I'm not.

MOLLY on TV:
We... had a fight. Miss Mooney said I had to come and see you. Didn't want to.

MRS MCCLUSKEY on TV:
Listen, Molly. When a teacher says something to you, you have to do it. Do you understand?

MOLLY on TV:
Yes, miss.

ALEX:
Molly.

MOLLY on TV:
It's just...

MRS MCCLUSKEY on TV:
What is it, Molly?

MOLLY on TV:
It's my mum.

ALEX:
Wha?

MOLLY on TV:
There's news.

Grange Hill theme tune and credits.

ALEX:
What news? Am I alive? Has someone found me?

ALEX thumps the television and the picture is replaced by static.



Opening credits:

ALEX voiceover:
My name is Alex Drake. I've been shot and that bullet's taken me back in time. Now I'm lost in 1982 and all I can do is fight, and search and stay alive. Because somehow, I will find a way home.



Luigi's. ALEX enters, carrying GENE's boots.

LUIGI:
Buona sera.

ALEX:
Luigi.

They both look over at GENE sitting in the corner, and ALEX goes over to him.

GENE:
My boots. Good.

ALEX:
Something's happening.

GENE:
What?

ALEX:
I don't know, but it's something significant. I, er, I think I might be going home.

GENE:
Yeah, I thought we'd sorted all this, Bolls. You're not going anywhere unless I say so. And I don't say so. Boots.



MUSIC: 'Rio' by Duran Duran.

The Quattro hares its way round the streets of London in the usual manner.

# Moving on the floor now, babe
# You're a bird of paradise
# Cherry ice cream smile
# I suppose it's very nice
# With a step to your left and a flick to the right
# You catch the mirror way out west
# You know you're something special #

The Quattro rounds a corner and nearly sends a pedestrian flying. He drops his boxes of oranges. I suppose for Gene that counts towards his five-a-day...

RAY:
Whoop. Woa-ho.

# And you look like you're the best #

ALEX:
The call said the man was dead. He's not going to be any more dead if we get their five minutes later.

# Her name is Rio and she dances on the sand.
# Just like that river twisting through the dusty land #

The Quattro is brought up short by a large Daimler (Limousine DS420, geeky folks) blocking the road. GENE sounds the horn irritably.

GENE:
Get out of the way, you bastards!

RAY:
Guv.

GENE:
Reverse, you twat, Or I'll rip your innards out!

RAY:
Guv.

GENE:
I'm gonna kill him.

RAY:
Guv.

ALEX:
There's a man with a giant penis.

A man carrying a large penis-shaped sign walks past; don't know what you were thinking.

GENE:
Right.

RAY:
Guv! It's Princess Margaret.

ALEX:
What's she doing in Soho?

RAY:
Dressmaker lives here I think.

GENE:
Sixth in line to the throne. Gene Hunt does not wait for the sixth in line to the bloody throne.

ALEX:
Oh God.

They all get out of the Quattro and walk the rest of the way, GENE storming ahead and ALEX bringing up the rear, looking around her.

ALEX:
All restaurants now.

A LITTLE OLD LADY approaches her and speaks in tones not dissimilar to Billy Connolly.

LITTLE OLD LADY channelling Scottish bloke:
It's all right, pretty lady. You're breathing.

ALEX:
What did you say?

LITTLE OLD LADY channelling Scottish bloke:
Not long now, pretty lady.

ALEX:
Have they found me? Wha.. What, what d'you know about me?

LITTLE OLD LADY being herself:
Oh nothing, miss.

GENE:
Er, Bolly? We have a dead person to look at, if that's all right with you?

ALEX:
(to the LITTLE OLD LADY) Thank you.



A dingy strip club interior; tables and chairs are dotted about. On the stage a man, dressed in women's underwear, fishnets and some dodgy bits of leather is slumped in a chair, hanging by a noose. He's very dead.

RAY:
Ho ho ho ho! Bloody Nora!

ALEX:
Try and remember that a human being lost his life here. A man, just like you.

CHRIS:
Now that's what I call well hung.

RAY laughs.

ALEX:
Has he been ID'd?

CONSTABLE:
No, ma'am.

GENE:
Right, you two. Go and have a talk with the woman who made the call.

CHRIS:
Guv.

ALEX:
Auto-erotic asphyxiation.

GENE:
What?

ALEX:
By strangling himself like that, his dying brain cells release glutamate. To prevent glutamate overload, the brain releases a receptor. It's these receptors that give rise to the feelings of euphoria.

GENE:
I didn't know you had a PhD in masturbation, DI Drake?

ALEX:
The trick is to ejaculate and then let go of the noose. Clearly it doesn't always work.



RAY and CHRIS are interviewing the manageress, JULIA, who appears to be making use of the time by cashing up.

JULIA:
Saw him when I opened up this morning. Bloody idiot, dying in the middle of my business.

CHRIS:
Try and remember a human being lost his life here. A man just like you.

RAY:
D'you know who he is?

JULIA:
No. Are you going to close me down?

RAY:
Well we can't have pervy punters expiring all over the place, can we? Not even in Soho.

JULIA:
Please.

RAY:
What's it worth?

JULIA:
I'll toss you both off?

CHRIS:
No, thank you.

RAY:
Maybe we could accept a contribution to the Metropolitan Police Home for the Bewildered.

CHRIS:
I don't want any money, Ray.

RAY:
What are you talking about? The slags and scum in this business earn a lot more than we do.

JULIA hands over some cash; RAY thrusts half into CHRIS' unwilling hand and helps himself to the rest on the counter.

JULIA:
All coppers are bastards.

RAY winks.

JULIA:
Toerags.



Meanwhile, back at the body...

GENE:
Somebody must have helped him truss himself up like this.

ALEX:
Actually the victims of auto-erotic asphyxiation are usually lone young males.

CONSTABLE:
This was found in the street outside, sir.

He hands across a Polaroid of the victim with a girl under-dressed as a saucy one-eyed pirate.

GENE:
Usually, but not always. Who's the pirate?

CONSTABLE:
Still trying to trace her, sir.

ALEX:
Well it's not usual.

GENE:
Open and shut. Some tart was giving him a five knuckle shuffle, he hollered his last. Said tart freaked out, galloped off down Berwick Street, left the Polaroid behind.

ALEX:
An accident.

GENE:
Y'know that would have taken Columbo an hour.



MUSIC: 'Love Plus One' by Haircut 100

GENE watches from a window above as SUPERMAC arrives in his Rover and enters the police station.



In CID, RAY is counting his cash while CHRIS gazes adoringly at SHAZ.

CHRIS:
See that woman over there? I think I knew it the moment I set eyes on her. Beautiful. Kind. Brave as a lion.

RAY:
All I can see is Shaz.

GENE enters.

GENE:
Right, Viv. Get everyone in this department in here now! Detective Superintendent Mackintosh is on his way to speak to us.

VIV:
Guv.

CHRIS:
He doesn't slum it with us these days?

ALEX:
Mmm. Finally I get to meet the great Supermac.

RAY:
What's going off, Guv?

GENE:
You know that dead bloke in the strip club?

RAY:
What about him?

SUPERMAC:
He was one of us.



SUPERMAC strides across CID with the victim's file open in his hand.

SUPERMAC:
Police Constable Sean Irvine. Graduated with flying colours from Hendon. We were talking about moving him up to CID. He would have been a colleague of yours.

RAY:
Why are you telling us all this, sir? He choked on his chicken in a strip club.

SUPERMAC:
On the day our colleagues in the forces prepare to fight and die for their country, it doesn't fill me with joy that a fellow officer died in such circumstances.

CHRSI:
Yeah. Papers'll have a field day.

SUPERMAC:
Why did a young PC with such prospects commit a sordid act in a sordid part of town?

RAY:
Perk of the job.

CID laugh.

SUPERMAC:
Because we let him down. Because he grew up as a young copper in a culture that said it was okay to overstep the mark. I know it's been hard for you. The city awash with new money and new crime and we're asked to police it with one hand tied behind our backs. But that's the new world we have to live in and there's no going back now.

RAY:
More's the pity.

Mutterings of 'Too right' from CID.

SUPERMAC:
The days of taking home a side of beef because the butcher appreciated you keeping the streets clean? Gone. The days of asking your mate in traffic to rip up a parking ticket. Gone. Now, we can either lament the passing of the old ways, become bitter and twisted and useless, or we can step into the new world. I'm a policeman. That's what I do. It's what I am. So for me there's no question I will adapt. But from now on it's a black and white world, gentlemen. I've just drawn a line in the sand. Whatever happened in the past, stays in the past. But what happens from this moment on... Either with me, or against me.

SUPERMAC goes to GENE's office.

SUPERMAC:
All right, Gene.

GENE:
Want a Scotch, sir?

CID mutter but get back to work. CHRIS looks worried, takes his half of the money from the strip club owner and stuffs it in RAY's jacket pocket. RAY is not impressed.



ALEX and GENE escort SUPERMAC out of CID into the corridor.

ALEX:
It's a real pleasure to meet you, sir. I'd heard a lot about you.

SUPERMAC:
And I you, Alex.

GENE:
Yes, moving on.

SUPERMAC:
I want you to deliver the agony message personally, Gene. Not some rookie PC.

GENE:
Okay, sir.

SUPERMAC:
And his colleagues need to be told. There was one guy in particular he was close to.

GENE:
Yeah, I'll get the boys onto it.

SUPERMAC:
Oh, and the Commissioner had a call from the Palace today.

GENE:
Buck House?

SUPERMAC:
It seems Princess Margaret was visiting her favourite dressmaker when a man holding a giant plastic penis walked in front of her car.

GENE:
Too much Scotch?

SUPERMAC:
And then, some foul-mouthed police officer refused to let her pass.

GENE:
No respect for our elders any more. Some people, eh?

SUPERMAC:
Irvine was supposed to clean up Soho. Instead he got corrupted by it.

ALEX:
We'll sort this, sir.



The Quattro pulls up outside a modest house in a suburb; GENE and ALEX get out.

GENE:
Hold up, Bolly. Personally I'm never in that much of a hurry to tell a wife her husband's dead.

ALEX:
Things are moving.

GENE:
They certainly are. Something to do with last night's vindaloo.

ALEX:
You heard him. We've got a job to do.

They ring the doorbell and we cut to the interior.

RUTH IRVINE:
He must have made a mistake. He's just not that sort of man.

GENE:
Well we all have our peccadilloes, love. Doesn't make him a bad person.

RUTH IRVINE:
He was the most loving husband you could ever imagine. His only problem was he was married to the poxy job.

ALEX:
He put in the hours, did he?

RUTH IRVINE:
It's not a job, it's a disease, and it's killed him.

GENE:
Well feel free to cry. I hear it's the done thing on these occasions.

RUTH IRVINE:
Piss off.

ALEX:
Did he ever ask you to watch him indulge in any sort of sexual fantasy?

RUTH IRVINE:
No.

GENE:
Never asked you to dress him up as a schoolgirl?

RUTH IRVINE:
No!

GENE:
Traffic warden?

RUTH IRVINE:
NO! Nothing like that.

GENE:
Princess Leia?

ALEX:
I think she said no.

RUTH IRVINE:
Not Sean. Never. Was Kevin with him? Where was Kevin?

ALEX:
(to GENE) That's PC Kevin Hales, his partner. (to RUTH IRVINE) Two of our best officers are talking to him now.



RAY and CHRIS approach KEVIN HALES in the locker room where he's changing into uniform.

RAY:
All right, mate? Are you Kevin Hales?

KEVIN HALES:
I am, yeah. Why? What can I do for you?

RAY:
Best mate of Sean Irvine?

KEVIN HALES:
Yeah.

RAY:
Well...

CHRIS:
He's dead.

KEVIN HALES:
What?

RAY:
Yeah, he died in a strip club in Soho.

CHRIS:
Dressed up like a woman.

KEVIN HALES:
Sean's dead?

RAY:
Yeah.



Back at the Irvine house.

GENE:
So there was never any extra money around the place?

RUTH IRVINE:
What are you implying?

GENE:
I'm implying that he worked in Vice.

RUTH IRVINE:
We lived on his police wages, if you can call it living. He's as straight as a die.

ALEX and GENE exchange a look, intercepted by RUTH IRVINE.

RUTH IRVINE:
So you're saying while I was sat here with the kids watching his tea go cold, he was dying in some strip club? No. No!

ALEX:
How was your marriage, would you say?

RUTH IRVINE:
He loved me, he loved the kids.

GENE:
What, you never caught him going through your knicker drawer?

RUTH IRVINE:
No!

ALEX:
I'm going to show you something now which, um... which I know will upset you...

RUTH IRVINE:
Oh God.

ALEX:
...but, er, it's important to clear up your husband's death, isn't it?

ALEX shows RUTH IRVINE the Polaroid. She's understandably upset.

GENE:
Straight as a die.

ALEX:
D'you recognise the woman in the photograph?

RUTH IRVINE shakes her head. At that moment her children return from school and she rushes to the eldest girl, sobbing.



GENE and ALEX leave the house.

ALEX:
I know wives are the last to know their husbands use prostitutes, but she did seem really sure he wasn't into that sort of thing.

GENE:
The great Charlie Rich once said 'Nobody knows what goes on behind closed doors'. Look, a copper gets his rocks off dressed up as Widow Twanky in front of hookers. It embarrasses me, it embarrasses the force. So we move on.

They get in the Quattro.

GENE:
Nobody knows anyone, Bolly. The great lie of this life is we pretend we do.

ALEX:
You never talk about Mrs Hunt, do you? Ex Mrs Hunt.

GENE:
That's right, I don't.

They drive off.



MUSIC: 'The Look of Love' by ABC

CHRIS and RAY (in particular) are enjoying the show back at the strip club.

# That's the look, that's the look
# The look of love
# That's the look, that's the look
# The look of love... #

RAY:
Oooooo

GENE arrives, also not adverse to taking in the sights.

#The look of love
# That's the look, that's the look
# The look of love
# Look of love.
# If you judge the book by the cover
# Then you judge the look by the lover #

ALEX arrives.

# I hope you'll soon recover #

ALEX:
This is supposed to be a crime scene.

RAY:
Manageress very kindly asked us if she could keep it open.

# Me, I go from one extreme to another #

CHRIS:
Apparently our girl dances here.

ALEX:
Well shouldn't we go backstage and find her?

There's a marked lack of enthusiasm from the boys.

ALEX:
Oh God. One day- one day I will go to a Woman of the Year lunch.

GENE:
Oh, don't get all high and mighty on us, Bolls. I'd like to see you up there shaking your bits and bobs.

ALEX:
In your dreams.

GENE:
I certainly hope so.

RAY:
Oh, you don't get many of them to the pound.

CHRIS is hit in the face with a very flimsy undergarment.

CHRIS:
Uh!

RAY:
Watch out, mate. They've all got crabs.

CHRIS drops it hurriedly.

CHRIS:
Uh!

RAY:
Hah ha.

The punters applaud as the show finishes and the music changes for the next act. The saucily under-dressed pirate from the Polaroid comes on stage.

MUSIC: 'Stand and Deliver' by Adam and the Ants

# Stand and deliver! #

RAY:
That's our girl.

ALEX:
Well, is somebody going to arrest her?

GENE:
Why are you always in such a hurry?

# I'm the dandy highwayman
# Who you're too scared to mention
# I spend my cash on looking flash
# And grabbing your attention
# The devil take your stereo
# And your record collection #

ALEX looks fed up; after a moment GENE prods RAY and they advance on the stage to arrest SALLY.

GENE:
Right then, Long John bloody Silver. You're nicked.

The punters groan and start heading for the exit; SALLY makes a bid for escape but RAY catches her.

SALLY:
Get off!

CHRIS:
Oi, you. Pick up that tissue. And you, put it in a bin.

SALLY:
Get off!



GENE and ALEX talk to a slightly more covered-up SALLY outside the strip club.

GENE:
So, you're a one-eyed stripper who likes to take a photograph.

SALLY:
I've got both me eyes, thanks. It's my stage persona.

ALEX:
So you don't deny then, that that's you in the photograph?

SALLY:
Yeah, that's me.

ALEX:
How well did you know the man?

SALLY:
I didn't. Apparently he came into the club and watched me strip. Then the boss said he wanted to do something in private.

ALEX:
And what did you say about that?

SALLY:
I said no. They said he was a police officer and they wanted to keep him happy. So I said I'd do it, but I'd only watch. Nothing else.

ALEX:
Watch what, exactly?

SALLY:
Just him, and take photos.

GENE:
What? One for the album?

SALLY:
Look, can I go in please? I don't know anything.

ALEX:
We're talking about the death of a police officer here.

SALLY:
God.

GENE:
Where's that accent from?

SALLY:
Hyde.

GENE:
Hyde? Manchester girl. You should have said so. Chris! Chris!

CHRIS:
Yeah?

ALEX:
Can we get on?

SALLY:
Look, I promise you he wasn't dead when I left him.

CHRIS appears.

GENE:
This young lady's from Manchester.

CHRIS:
Guv?

GENE:
Go and get her a decent cup of tea and a biscuit. What sort of biscuits d'you like, love?

SALLY:
Garibaldis.

GENE chuckles and hand CHRIS some cash.

GENE:
(to CHRIS) Mush!



KEVIN HALES walks into CID.

SHAZ:
Can I help you?

KEVIN HALES:
Yeah, I want to see Hunt.

SHAZ:
DCI Hunt's out of the office at present. If you'd like me to leave...

KEVIN HALES sweeps a stack of papers of SHAZ's desk.

KEVIN HALES:
I want to see him now!



Back outside the strip club.

ALEX:
Are you telling us the absolute truth?

GENE:
Oh, what are you doing down here, Sal? Getting your kit off for a bunch of pervy Southerners?

SALLY:
Trying to be an actress.

ALEX:
That's what they all say.

SALLY:
Look I'm really sorry about what's happened.

GENE:
Okay. Off you go, Sal. Stop all this stripping nonsense, there's a good girl. Felicity Kendal didn't get where she is by taking her clothes off. (to ALEX) Did she?

ALEX:
I don't think so, no.

SALLY:
Thank you. Mr Hunt?

GENE:
Hmm?

SALLY:
You won't tell my mum, will ya?

GENE:
No, love.

SALLY returns to the club.

GENE:
There you go, sex game gone wrong. End of.

ALEX looks at him, unimpressed.

GENE:
What?

ALEX:
Well was that it? I've seen bacon grilled for longer than that. God. Je- I'm even starting to speak like you.

RAY:
Hey, are we letting that tart go?

ALEX:
Oh she's not a tart, Ray. She's an actress.

CHRIS:
Guv. Viv's been on the radio. The dead copper's mate really wants to speak to you.



GENE and ALEX talk to KEVIN HALES in the Gents. As you do.

KEVIN HALES:
They say you're a legend. Start acting like one.

GENE:
You wanted to talk to me, so talk.

KEVIN HALES:
Yeah, I'll not have my best mate hung out to dry. A laughing stock for the entire force.

GENE;
Now I'd say he brought that on himself, wouldn't you? Dressed up like Hilda Ogden in a Soho clip joint?

ALEX:
What sort of man was Sean?

KEVIN HALES:
He was a bloody good one. Best mate I've ever had.

ALEX:
Did he sleep with the girls?

KEVIN HALES:
He's dead. W-w-w-what difference does it make? Humiliating him now. All I ask...

GENE:
My sympathy for the death of your friend is starting to dribble away, police constable.

KEVIN HALES:
What d'you want me to say?

ALEX:
The truth.

KEVIN HALES:
He was getting in a bit deeper than normal. But that's all I'll say.

ALEX:
So he did sleep with the girls.

KEVIN HALES:
When you work in Soho, it's sort of a perk of the job. Everyone does it. (he looks at GENE) Right? But he's one of ours, and you're hanging him out to dry. Think of his wife!

GENE:
You watch your lip, constable! What d'you mean, 'deeper'?

KEVIN HALES:
I don't know the details because I asked him not to tell me. But he was getting... agitated. You know, nervy. I just couldn't keep him away from the girls. It was like a drug.

GENE:
Game, set and match, Gene Hunt.

GENE leaves; ALEX glowers at KEVIN HALES for a bit then follows.



MUSIC: 'The Model' by Kraftwerk

RAY, CHRIS and SHAZ are in the CID kitchen; CHRIS is evidently in the dog house.

RAY:
Yeah, he had a smile like a Cheshire cat.

CHRIS:
I-I did not.

SHAZ:
Can't you see it demeans women?

RAY:
Bollocks. They get paid.

CHRIS:
I was working, Shaz. I had to be there.

RAY:
He actually said that he wouldn't mind seeing you up there on stage, wiggling your tassels around.

CHRIS:
That's not what I said. I-I-I said you'd be as good looking as any of them, if you were a stripper. Which you're not. Because that would demean you.

SHAZ:
Go and play with yourself.

SHAZ leaves, CHRIS following. RAY laughs.

RAY:
Classic!



CID. GENE and ALEX enter.

GENE:
Copper obsessed with the tarts gets off by dressing up, gets a girl to watch. She leaves, he dies. End of.

ALEX:
Chris, get hold of the pathologist. I want to run a blood test on Irvine.

CHRIS:
Boss. Er, ma'am.

GENE:
I am telling you, Bolly, it was an accident.

ALEX:
Ray! Talk to all Ruth Irvine's friends and neighbours. Find out what sort of a woman she is.

RAY:
Urh.

ALEX grabs her jacket and holds open the door, looking at GENE pointedly. He gives in and they leave. As they're coming out of the station, SUPERMAC pulls up in his Rover.

SUPERMAC:
All sorted, Gene?

GENE:
Almost there, sir. Just tying up a few loose ends.

SUPERMAC:
Good stuff. Short and sharp so it doesn't effect morale. Alex.

SUPERMAC drives off; ALEX looks at GENE incredulously.

GENE:
It's called respect. You should look it up.

ALEX sighs and follows, only to be distracted by a POLICE DOG whining.

ALEX:
Oo.

POLICE DOG channelling police radio:
Female. Mid-thirties with gunshot wound to head.

STATIC.

ALEX:
What's happened?

POLICE DOG channelling police radio:
Alpha Victor Lima One! Urgent medical assistance required!

STATIC

POLICE DOG:
Woof. Woof. Woof woof!

(I can't believe I just wrote that...)

GENE:
Don't frighten the dog, Bolls.



Luigi's and ALEX is sitting down for a meal for one, an ever-attentive LUIGI waiting on her. Members of CID are seated in the background; CHRIS hovering by the bar.

ALEX:
You know, I've had the strangest day today, Luigi. After months of nothing really happening, I think today, someone finally found me. A tramp, maybe. Down by the river.

LUIGI:
Oh, you have to be careful down by the river.

ALEX:
But you know what it means? It means that I am alive, and all these months were just seconds. I hear voices through other voices.

LUIGI:
Like Rod Hull and Emu, eh? I like very much.

ALEX:
Something's about to happen.

LUIGI:
You're right there.

LUIGI has spotted the approach of ALEX's meal, takes the plate from a waiter and sets it down in front of her.

ALEX:
Ah. Veal scaloppini. You spoil me, Luigi.

LUIGI:
I cook in my special sauce. My mother's sauce. Not for these others. Pearls before swine, eh? Enjoy, Signorina.

ALEX:
Thank you.

ALEX prepares to eat, only to be interrupted by CHRIS.

CHRIS:
Can I have a quick word?

ALEX:
Er, can it wait, Chris? 'Til I've had a...

CHRIS:
It's Shaz. She's giving me the cold shoulder.

ALEX resigns herself to having to postpone her meal.

ALEX:
Why? Why is she?

CHRIS:
Well, she says I enjoyed looking at those naked girls.

ALEX:
Well do you?

CHRIS:
Yeah. But she says it's degrading to women.

ALEX:
Well she's right, Chris. It is.

CHRIS:
But I can't help it how I feel when I look at a woman taking her clothes off, can I?

ALEX:
Look, let me try and turn it around for you, okay? How would you feel about letting Shaz watch men strip?

CHRIS:
Men? Stripping?!

ALEX:
Yeah.

CHRIS:
That's disgusting. Women don't want to see that.

ALEX:
Look, let me just finish my dinner in peace and I will think of something to get you back on track with Shaz. Okay?

CHRIS:
Thank you, boss.

ALEX:
Okay.

CHRIS:
Ma'am.

ALEX addresses her plate again, only to be interrupted by GENE's arrival.

GENE:
How's your food?

ALEX:
I really wouldn't know.

GENE:
Well it's your own fault.

ALEX:
What is?

GENE:
Get your coat. We're off to the morgue. Raymondo!



Mortuary. Body, slab, overly cheery pathologist. The usual televisual fare.

PATHOLOGIST:
I must admit it looked like an open and shut case of auto-erotic asphyxiation. Thought I'd be home for Russell Harty and corned beef hash.

GENE:
Get on with it 'cos she's hungry.

RAY:
That was a good scrap.

PATHOLOGIST:
At your suggestion, DI Drake, I had a little rummage in his blood.

CHRIS:
What was?

RAY:
Russell Harty and Grace Jones. A big poof and a diesel dyke.

PATHOLOGIST:
Where I found an amount of trichloroethanol.

GENE:
What?

ALEX:
Metabolised chloral hydrate.

PATHOLOGIST:
Precisely.

GENE:
What?

ALEX:
Date rape.

GENE:
What?!

ALEX:
Temper, temper.

GENE:
Well speak English.

ALEX:
Somebody slipped him a Mickey Finn. There's bruising to the shoulders. Scratches on the wrists. It's as though he's been forcibly held down.

PATHOLOGIST:
Well that would be my guess, yes. You're good at this.

ALEX:
So somebody incapacitated him, but he was still strong enough to struggle while they put on the women's clothing.

GENE:
Well the only person we know was at the scene was Sally.

ALEX:
He's a big man. Be hard to hold him down.

GENE:
D'you know, I'm beginning to smell a very big, very smelly rat.

CHRIS:
Grace Jones is a lesbian?

GENE:
What's the actual cause of death?

PATHOLOGIST:
Choked on his own vomit.

ALEX:
An overdose of chloral hydrate would lead to convulsions and vomiting. He didn't stand a chance.

GENE:
Be very clear what you're saying. A police officer has been murdered?

PATHOLOGIST:
It would appear so.



GENE manhandles SALLY out into the alley outside the strip club.

GENE:
You lied, Sally. That disappoints me.

SALLY:
Dunno what you mean.

GENE:
The police officer was murdered.

SALLY:
Murdered?

ALEX:
Yeah. Seems you were the last person to see him alive.

SALLY:
Look, I told you everything I know, so please, can you just...

GENE:
I'm not going to phone your mum. I'm going to drive up to Manchester myself and bring her back with me. And I'm going to sit next to her while she watches her little girl waggling her bits in front of London's finest deviants!

SALLY:
You wouldn't!

GENE:
Then start talking!

SALLY:
I told you. Look, the dead guy asked me to photographs of him dressed up like a woman. I said no, but he gave me money. That's it! I'm not saying anything else.

GENE:
Perhaps I didn't make myself clear.

SALLY:
There's things in this world a lot more scary than you, Mr Hunt.

ALEX's attention is drawn away from SALLY and she's suddenly bathed in bright light and can hear modern police and ambulance sirens. They go as quickly as they came.

GENE:
What's up with you, Bolls? Somebody walking all over your grave again?

Muffled gunshot and SALLY staggers forward into GENE's arms, shot in the back.

SALLY:
Uh!

GENE:
Sally!

SALLY gasps for air.

GENE:
Jesus, she's been shot. That way. Go! Go!

ALEX runs off as indicated, leaving GENE to look after SALLY. Which personally I find unlikely, however...

MUSIC: 'Centerfold' by J Geils Band
(just faintly in the background, presumably coming from one of the strip joints - one for the very geeky, er, alert there)

# My memory has just been sold
# My angel is the centerfold
# Angel is the centerfold... #

ALEX comes to a halt, no sign of the gunman.



GENE is sitting against the wall outside the strip club, SALLY held in his arms.

GENE:
Okay.

SALLY:
I'm not a bad person.

GENE:
No, you're not a bad person.

SALLY:
I only wanted to be an actress.

GENE:
Well you will be an actress. Now stop talking.

SALLY:
Uh.

GENE:
Stay with me, Sally. You stay with me.

SALLY:
You won't tell my mum?

GENE:
No, I won't tell your mum.



CID is dark, and empty apart from ALEX. GENE comes out of his office, puts a glass of whisky on the desk next to her and slumps down in the chair opposite.

GENE:
They should out a sign up at every train station in the North saying the streets of London are paved with shit.

ALEX:
Why kill a kid like that? What could she possibly have known that would be worth her death? I don't know what I'm in this miserable place for. I have no idea.

GENE:
I know why you're here, Bolls. You only had to ask.

ALEX:
Why? Why am I here?

GENE:
Same reason as me. To keep the streets clean and to find this girl's killer.



The Quattro races up to RUTH IRVINE's house, followed by a police Rover. GENE and ALEX get out.

GENE:
I'm telling you, Ray's been talking to the grieving widow's neighbours. She wasn't where she said she was. She's lied to Uncle Gene, Bolls. (to uniform) You two, wait here a moment.

ALEX:
She's still just lost her husband.

GENE:
Someone's been yanking my chain and I don't like it.

ALEX:
Just don't go into her house like a bull in a china shop.

GENE busts open the front door and storms in. ALEX sighs.

GENE:
Good morning! Is this the china shop?

RUTH IRVINE:
What are you doing? How dare you just burst in here like this!

GENE:
Get your knickers on, you're knicked.

ALEX herds the Irvine children back into the kitchen.

ALEX:
Come on. Come on, kids. You don't need to hear this. In you go. In you go. Wait in there.

RUTH IRVINE:
They're burying their father this week.

GENE:
Well I hope you booked the space next to him, because I'm going to bury you.



Interview room.

GENE:
Let's run through the facts one more time, shall we? Your husband was found dead in a Soho clip joint.

RUTH IRVINE:
You show me some respect.

GENE:
I don't respect people who lie to me. Found trussed up like Danny LaRue, choked on his own vomit. Murdered.

ALEX:
We did have a witness to your husband's last moments, but unfortunately she's dead too.

GENE:
Sweet girl. Full of life. And now her blood is soaking into the shitty tarmac of a shitty Soho street.

RUTH IRVINE:
Why are you telling me all this?

GENE:
D'you know what I think? I think your husband was playing away with some of Soho's finest.

RUTH IRVINE:
No, I won't believe that!

GENE:
I think that you found out about it and had him murdered, and then stitched it up to look like a sex game gone wrong.

RUTH IRVINE:
No!

GENE:
And when it became obvious that we were about to get Sally to spill the beans, you had her murdered.

RUTH IRVINE:
No!

GENE:
She died in my arms! A frightened little girl a long way from home.

ALEX:
Why did you tell us that you were at home that night with the kids, when the kids were with a neighbour?

By now RUTH IRVINE is sobbing.

RUTH IRVINE:
I'm sorry but I can't.

GENE:
I want the truth!

ALEX:
You didn't kill them, did you?

RUTH IRVINE:
No.

ALEX:
What are you hiding?

SUPERMAC enters.

SUPERMAC:
Gene.

RUTH IRVINE:
Charlie!

RUTH IRVINE throws herself into SUPERMAC's arms. No accounting for taste.

SUPERMAC:
S'all right, love. It's all right. (to GENE) A word, please.



Outside the interview. room.

SUPERMAC:
What's she told you?

GENE:
Lies, mostly.

ALEX:
She doesn't have an alibi for the night her husband was killed.

SUPERMAC:
She does actually. The reason Ruth wasn't at home with her kids is that she was with me.

GENE:
With you?

SUPERMAC:
Yes, with me. In my bed.

ALEX:
So you're having an affair with Ruth Irvine?

SUPERMAC:
I'm not proud of it.

GENE:
You're sleeping with a junior police officer's wife?

SUPERMAC:
The point is, Mrs Irvine is not a suspect in her husband's death.

GENE:
You going to be speaking at his funeral?

SUPERMAC:
You can't help who you fall in love with, Gene.

GENE:
Is that right, sir?

SUPERMAC:
None of this changes the bigger picture. I want Soho cleaned up I want the man who murdered my officer. Now, if you'll excuse me.

SUPERMAC returns to the interview room.



GENE and ALEX return to CID.

ALEX:
Nobody knows anyone. Who said that?

GENE:
Sean Irvine was walking the mean streets of Soho whilst his wife was being skewered by his senior officer.

ALEX:
I think 'love' was the word he used.

RAY:
I've been asking around about this Sean Irvine, guv. He was well liked. Nobody's got a bad word to say about him.

CHRIS:
Girls really liked him. Said he was fair, he never took advantage of them.

GENE:
Bent?

RAY:
There's no evidence to say he was.

ALEX:
Which all backs up what his wife says about him.

GENE:
So the only person who says Irvine was taking a stroll on the dark side was his mate, PC Kevin Hales.

ALEX:
Who came in here specially to tell us that.

GENE:
Right, go fetch.

RAY and CHRIS leave and GENE goes into his office. ALEX goes to her desk and finds a single red rose lying there; a still smoking cigarette is in the ashtray. She picks up the rose and reads the label attached to it.

ALEX:
'Congratulations, they've found you'

Police sirens, distorted radio/tannoy and helicopter noise start as ALEX walks to the centre of CID. She looks up, shielding her eyes as CID goes dark and a bright light, like a searchlight, picks her out and a wind or down draught whips at her. The rest of CID take no notice. The light and noise fade and ALEX is left looking dazed.

GENE:
Bolls!

GENE holds the photographs of the sewer, across which someone has scrawled 'Pont de l'Alma'.

ALEX:
Wha?

GENE:
Get in here.

ALEX goes into GENE's office, still dazed. GENE hands her the photographs.

GENE:
What the hell is this and what does it mean?

ALEX:
Pont de l'Alma. Er, Alma Bridge. I dunno, I didn't write it.

GENE:
Rubbish. You're the only one who writes French in here.

ALEX:
I'm telling you, I didn't write it.

GENE:
Where's bloody Hales.

GENE leaves, Alex still puzzles over the photographs.

ALEX:
Does ring a bell though.



Interview room.

GENE:
The death of your friend has been a bit traumatic for you.

KEVIN HALES:
Yes, sir.

GENE:
Even though you told us he was a bit pervy.

KEVIN HALES:
No, not pervy. Whatever he got up to in private, I guess it didn't hurt anyone. We're talking Soho. Nothing's black and white there.

ALEX:
Well, apart from your friend Sean.

KEVIN HALES:
Ma'am?

ALEX:
Well he was white, wasn't he? I mean he was honest.

KEVIN HALES:
Yeah, I didn't say he wasn't honest.

GENE:
The question is, does that make you black?

KEVIN HALES:
I dunno what you mean.

GENE:
Well you said your mate, your best mate, used to tax the girls, and we know he didn't.

KEVIN HALES:
If that's what you think, that's good.

ALEX:
Where were you the night Sean was killed?

KEVIN HALES:
I wasn't on duty that night. Neither was he. I was at Stamford Bridge.

GENE:
On your own?

KEVIN HALES:
No, with 30,000 other people.

GENE:
On the other night?

KEVIN HALES:
What night?

GENE:
The night the girl was killed.

KEVIN HALES:
I was in a police cell.

ALEX:
What were you doing in a police cell?

KEVIN HALES:
I'd had a few drinks, I was in a funny mood. I got into a fight with a pimp in Soho.

ALEX:
Right. Well that'll be on your record.

KEVIN HALES:
Oh, no charges were brought.

GENE:
I'll have that checked out.

KEVIN HALES:
You do that, sir.

GENE:
I'm going to turn your life upside down, constable.

KEVIN HALES:
Look, I'm not saying I'm the perfect copper. But I didn't kill my mate and I didn't kill that girl.

GENE:
Get out of my sight.



GENE and ALEX make their way across the station's car park to the Quattro.

GENE:
What d'you think about Mac now?

ALEX:
I think he's very attractive. I think he's pulling the Met in the right direction. And I think he said the word 'love' in a police station.

GENE:
Oh God, give me strength.

ALEX:
What do you think of Mac?

RUTH IRVINE approaches them; it's clear what GENE thinks of her.

GENE:
What do you want?

RUTH IRVINE:
To talk to you.

GENE:
Well make an appointment.

RUTH IRVINE:
To talk to you where the walls don't have ears.



GENE, ALEX and RUTH IRVINE adjourn to another area of the car park. Not that much more secure a place I'd have thought, but moving on...

RUTH IRVINE:
When I got back from my interview with you, I found my whole house had been trashed.

ALEX:
What?

GENE:
Well phone your local cops. We're not interested.

RUTH IRVINE:
You don't like me very much, do you?

GENE:
Your husband died doing his job while you were impaled on another man's baton. What is there to like?

RUTH IRVINE:
Sean was a decent, loving man...

GENE:
Oh, spare me the crocodile tears, please.

RUTH IRVINE:
Will you put your schoolboy morality aside for one second and listen? Nothing was missing because they didn't find what they were looking for.

ALEX:
And what was that?

RUTH IRVINE:
My husband's personal diary. He used to just keep it on the bookshelf in the kitchen, but a few weeks ago he started hiding it under the floorboards in our bedroom.

ALEX:
And did he say why?

RUTH IRVINE:
He just said it was safer there. I thought there might be something significant in it. That's what you do, isn't it? Find the significance.

ALEX:
Yeah.

RUTH IRVINE:
Have you ever been in love, Mr Hunt?

GENE:
Well there was the time Wendy Barton let me put a frog down her knickers.

RUTH IRVINE:
Sometimes love is dark and very dangerous and leaves you not liking yourself very much. Find the people who killed my husband. Please.



MUSIC: 'Rat Race' by The Specials.

CID is buzzing with activity - for a change. RAY is on the telephone.

RAY:
Listen mate, I don't care if your wife does leave you, all right? A man died in that club and we need to find out who was there. Well just go and have a word with her, all right? 'Cos you're coming down the station.

CHRIS is interviewing JULIA again.

CHRIS:
Before it wasn't a double murder inquiry. So tell me what happened that night.

JULIA:
Same as happens every night. I told you all this before. They're punters. They pay their money, have a quick wank under their macs and leave.

SHAZ:
That's disgusting.

CHRIS:
Yeah. You should be ashamed of yourself.

SHAZ:
Why should women be treated like objects? It's not right!

JULIA rolls her eyes. RAY, meanwhile, is studying the Polaroid with a magnifier and Being A Detective.



Meanwhile ALEX and GENE are in his office, going through Sean Irvine's diary.

ALEX:
There's an entire two pages at the back. KH.

GENE:
Kevin Hales.

ALEX:
Forty pounds, eighty pounds... There's a lot of payments.

GENE:
But why would he be paying Hales?

ALEX:
Well maybe he wasn't. Maybe he was keeping a note of the payments Hales received.

GENE:
Supposition, Bolls.

ALEX:
There's got to be something here. It's got to be staring us in the face.

GENE:
Let's look at the morning of the last day of his life. 10am, Soho Association. 12 o'clock, SM.

ALEX:
Sado-masochism?

GENE:
Well it would explain why he died looking like me Auntie Shelia.

ALEX:
'K, I'm going to go back to the club.

GENE:
What for?

ALEX:
Just... I don't know, maybe we missed something.

ALEX leaves and RAY comes in.

RAY:
Guv.

GENE:
What?

RAY:
Fire up the photocopier.



GENE, RAY, CHRIS and SHAZ are gathered round the photocopier while VIV tries to make it work.

RAY:
Why does this thing never bloody work?

VIV:
It hasn't been the same since that lady from accounts photocopied her bum at the Christmas party.

RAY chuckles.

RAY:
She's had a few brandy snaps in her life, hadn't she? Lovely. (to CHRIS) Hey, have you still got that photocopy of her arse?

CHRIS:
No.

RAY:
Oh, here we go. Right, I've got it set to maximum magnification.

CHRIS:
Just like Harrison Ford.

The photocopier whirrs and RAY studies the result.

RAY:
I knew it.

SHAZ:
Yeah, I can see it.

CHRIS:
I can't.

GENE:
What am I looking for?

RAY:
See the face?

GENE:
Mmm.

RAY:
Kevin Hales.



ALEX walks along the deserted Soho street, looking around, and then up as she hears the noise of a helicopter. Suddenly a hand holding a cloth is clamped over her mouth and she's grabbed from behind. She tries the scream and struggles, but her vision blurs and the screen goes black.

ALEX wakes to the sound of a bleeping monitor and blurred lights. They come into focus and are revealed as the sort you'd expect in an operating theatre.

ALEX:
I made it. I made it home.

ALEX looks to her left and sees a drip.

ALEX:
Hello. I'm awake.

Beyond the drip is a trolley with various medical items and a police radio. On the lower shelf is a bunch of red roses.

ALEX:
Molly. Molly?

A figure in green scrubs and mask, wearing spectacles, comes round the edge of the medical screens surrounding the bed.

ALEX:
Oh. I survived the bullet. Is, is my daughter here?

The 'doctor' leans over ALEX, looking down at her.

MARTIN SUMMERS:
I'm a little disappointed in you. The great detective can't unravel the simplest clue?

ALEX:
What's happening?

MARTIN SUMMERS:
Pont de l'Alma. Does it ring any bells?

ALEX:
What?

MARTIN SUMMERS:
D'you like the rose?

ALEX realises this isn't going the way she'd have expected.

MARTIN SUMMERS:
I've found you out, Alex. This isn't your home.

ALEX:
But I am home.

MARTIN SUMMERS pulls back one of the screens to reveal they're definitely not in a hospital.

MARTIN SUMMERS:
1982.

ALEX:
No.

She struggles and we see she's strapped to the bed. MARTIN SUMMERS picks up the police radio from the trolley and places it next to ALEX's head.

MARTIN SUMMERS:
Wouldn't want your friends to miss out on all the fun. Will they come to your rescue if they can hear you scream?

ALEX:
Please.

MARTIN SUMMERS:
There's nothing like pain to loosen the tongue.

MARTIN SUMMERS adjusts the drip and ALEX is clearly being drugged with something and her vision blurs again.

MARTIN SUMMERS:
I've been hearing all about you, Alex. I want you to tell me what you're doing here. You see, I know you don't belong in this world.

ALEX shouts into the radio.

ALEX:
Ah! This is DI Alex Drake! Help me, somebody, please!

CID. CHRIS looks puzzled as he hears ALEX's cries for help.

ALEX over the radio:
Help me! Help...

In the Quattro GENE picks up his radio.

ALEX over the radio:
Please! Please!

GENE into the radio:
Bolly, what's going on? Where are you?

In CID CHRIS picks up the phone to see if that's where the voice is coming from. SHAZ heads straight for the desk drawer and picks up the radio.

ALEX over the radio.
Please. Please. Help me, somebody. Please!

SHAZ into the radio:
Ma'am?

GENE into the radio:
DI Drake, talk to me.

ALEX over the radio:
Somebody, please!

ALEX is obviously in agony.

ALEX:
Aargh.

ALEX over the radio:
Help me, plea...

GENE into the radio:
Bolly. Bolly.

The Quattro comes to a screeching halt in the street near the strip club.

ALEX starts to see blurred images of modern paramedics.

PARAMEDICS:
Pressure damage. I'm on it... I'm on it. Airway clear. You with us, love? Alex? Can you hear me?

Sounds of sirens.


GENE runs down the street, looking around for signs of ALEX.

GENE into the radio:
Where are you, Bolly?


MARTIN SUMMERS:
What are you doing in this place? What d'you want?

PARAMEDICS:
Dilating big time. Right, step back.

Voices become distorted. ALEX is in agony and screams.

ALEX:
No!

Outside in the street GENE hears and runs to a metal shuttered frontage. He hammers at it.

GENE:
Bolly!

GENE starts to haul up the shutter.

MARTIN SUMMERS:
Just tell me!

GENE:
Bolly!

MARTIN SUMMERS hears him and makes his escape.

MARTIN SUMMERS:
This isn't the end, Alex.

GENE finally gets the shutter open enough to enter.

GENE:
Bolly!

ALEX:
Guv.

GENE arrives on the scene even as MARTIN SUMMERS is disappearing up the steps in the background.

GENE:
Alex.

GENE looks at the drip and removes it.

GENE:
Alex. Wake up. Alex, wake up! Come on, wake up. Alex, wake up. Wake up, Alex! Come on!

Eventually she takes the hint and wakes up...

ALEX:
Am I dead?

GENE:
Not unless I'm St Peter. And I find that highly unlikely, don't you?



ALEX's flat. ALEX is sitting on the sofa, looking pretty shaken, glancing at the photographs with 'Pont de l'Alma' scrawled on them; GENE brings her a glass of water.

GENE:
Someone went to a lot of trouble to freak you out, Bolly.

ALEX:
I know.

GENE:
You attract nutters. I've noticed that about you.

ALEX:
Yeah, so have I.

GENE:
We checked Kevin Hales' alibi the night that Sally was shot. He said he was in a police cell, but I read his charge sheet. He was banged up for five minutes before a mate let him out.

ALEX:
Well let's go and get him now.

GENE:
No, it's fine. Ray and Chris have got it under control.

At which point GENE's radio crackles into life.

RAY over the radio:
Guv. Guv! Guv, we're outside Hales' flat and the bastard's firing at us! Armed response are on their way.

GENE into the radio:
A simple bloody arrest.

RAY over the radio:
He was going nuts before we even got here!

ALEX:
Well why, if he didn't even know we were coming for him?

GENE:
Don't know, don't care.

GENE starts to leave; ALEX follows.

GENE:
Where d'you think you're going?

ALEX:
I'm coming with you.

GENE:
Can't get enough, can you?



The Quattro roars into the central square of an estate of low-rise flats. RAY and CHRIS are sheltering behind a Talbot Alpine, guns drawn, as GENE and ALEX get out.

RAY:
Get down, guv!

KEVIN HALES in on a balcony above, armed with a rifle which he's casually firing with one hand, the other holding a bottle of whisky.

GENE:
Where's Hales?

A shot rings out and shatters the driver's window in the Quattro. GENE and ALEX dive for cover behind the car.

ALEX:
He's up there.

GENE:
He shot my car.

GENE is furious and gets up again to yell at KEVIN HALES.

GENE:
You shot my car, you bastard!

ALEX pulls him back behind the car as another shot rings out.

RAY:
Sod armed response, guv. We can sort this joker out.

CHRIS:
How you feeling, ma'am?

ALEX:
Fine, thanks Chris.

RAY:
Poof.

KEVIN HALES:
Come on, you bastards! Come and get me! Come on!

Some people wander into view.

ALEX:
Get down!

GENE:
You lot! Get back in, now!

KEVIN HALES:
Oi! Oi!

ALEX:
He's drunk.

GENE draws his gun.

GENE:
He's dead.

ALEX:
Oh, put that away.

GENE:
He's going to kill someone.

ALEX:
He already has.

GENE:
Exactly. That's why I'm going to take him out.

ALEX:
Just let me talk to him.

GENE puts his gun away again.

GENE:
I'll do it.

ALEX:
What?

GENE:
You're still all over the place after your little meeting with Dr Death.

ALEX:
Well what do you know about talking someone down?

GENE:
Well I've watched you. How hard can it be? Bit of tea and sympathy, pretending you care about their shagging, sniveling little lives.

ALEX:
There's a little bit more to it than that.

GENE stands up and walks forward, hands in the air.

GENE:
Kevin Hales? I know you murdered your mate. You're probably feeling bad about it. Not, it has to be said, as bad as he does. So stop feeling sorry for yourself and start behaving like a bloody man!

KEVIN HALES fires and GENE dives for cover again.

GENE:
Bastard.

ALEX:
Can't you see, right? This is what he wants. His victim-precipitated homicide.

GENE:
Speak English, Bolly, or I swear to God I will shoot you.

ALEX:
His death by cop, okay? He's killed his mate, he feels guilty about it. This is the ending that he wants.

GENE:
Then I suggest we give it to him.

CHRIS:
Armed response are here, guv.

Members of the armed response team charge up stairs. ALEX gets up and makes a dash to get to KEVIN HALES first and talk him down. Does this woman never learn?

GENE:
Bolly. Bolly! Bolly!

ALEX runs up the stairs behind KEVIN HALES, who's still yelling defiance to the men below.

KEVIN HALES:
Come on, you bastards! Come and get me!

ALEX:
Kevin? Kevin?! Kevin. I, er... I never met Sean.

KEVIN HALES:
You're not fit to say his name.

ALEX:
Yeah, so I hear. He was a decent copper and a good man.

KEVIN HALES:
He was my friend.

ALEX:
What happened, Kevin?

KEVIN HALES goes back on the balcony and yells down, shooting.

KEVIN HALES:
Come on, you bastards!

ALEX:
Kevin, what happened?!

Armed response officers arrive behind ALEX. KEVIN HALES retreats back into the stairwell.

KEVIN HALES:
I killed him. I didn't mean to. He knew I was on the take, and he said he was going to report me. I thought I'd get some pictures of him. Keep his mouth shut that way.

ALEX:
So you didn't mean to kill him. Well that's... that's important.

KEVIN HALES:
I paid the girl, went back inside and he was dead. Choked.

ALEX:
Yeah, we know. But you did kill Sally.

KEVIN HALES nods.

ALEX:
Don't let Sean down again. Come on, make him proud of you. Just... just put the gun down. Just put it down. Go on. Go on. Just put it down.

Slowly, KEVIN HALES puts first the whisky bottle, and then the rifle down on the ground and puts his hands up.

KEVIN HALES:
Sorry, Sean.

Armed response officers storm up the stairs in response to ALEX waving them in.

ALEX:
Come on.

ARMED RESPONSE OFFICER:
Armed police! Step away from the weapon! Turn around, Kevin.



KEVIN HALES is brought out of the building, hands cuffed behind his back, two armed response officers holding his arms.

ALEX:
We're arresting you for the murders of Sean Irvine and Sally Jason.

KEVIN HALES winks; ALEX looks puzzled. Meanwhile RAY arrives with a box evidently containing a television.

RAY:
Hey, have you seen this lot? It's like a wet dream in Radio Rentals in his gaff.

CHRIS:
Guv.

GENE picks up one of many rolls of bank notes from a box held out by CHRIS, evidently from HALES' flat.

GENE:
What's this? 50% for the pimps, 10% for you?

KEVIN HALES:
Nothing you wouldn't do. Legend.

GENE drops the bank roll back in the box and punches him in the stomach.

KEVIN HALES:
Uh.

GENE:
Have a nice day, cop killer. (to the armed response officers) Get him out of my sight.

GENE walks across to the boxes brought from KEVIN HALES' flat. KEVIN HALES is taken towards a police van, where ALEX is waiting with a breathalyser.

GENE:
Right, who wants a television?

ALEX:
Hi. Blow into this.

KEVIN HALES:
Yeah, blow yourself.

ALEX gives KEVIN HALES another punch in the stomach.

KEVIN HALES:
Aah.

ALEX:
I said blow into it.

KEVIN HALES gasps for breath but manages to blow into the breathalyser. ALEX looks at the reading.

ALEX:
You're not drunk.

KEVIN HALES:
I'm just a pebble on the beach, ma'am. I'm nothing. We are everywhere. Everywhere.

ALEX:
Get rid of him.



CID. ALEX is at her desk going through Sean Irvine's diary again; GENE is on his way out.

GENE:
He confessed. He's in the Polaroid. And if you don't mind, I'm going to get myself a drink.

ALEX:
I'm not saying he didn't do it, but why pretend to be drunk?

GENE:
I don't know. Does everything have to have a reason?

ALEX:
Maybe somebody wants us to think that he was working alone. Maybe he was told to act drunk and confess.

GENE:
What 'someone else'? Your Nurse Ratchet?

ALEX:
SM.

GENE:
Sado-masochism. We've done that bit.

ALEX:
But he wasn't, was he? That's what Kevin Hales wanted us to think.

ALEX turns to another entry in the diary.

ALEX:
'Meeting with SM, goes well'

Suddenly it dawns on her.

ALEX:
Supermac.

GENE:
Mac.

ALEX:
He had a meeting with Sean on the last day of his life.

GENE:
Yeah, but it's not unusual for a Superintendent to meet his PCs. Specially if he was going to fast-track them into CID.

ALEX:
No, but it is unusual not to tell the people who are investigating that PC's murder!

GENE:
No.

ALEX:
Yes.

GENE:
No. Enough. Keep Mac out of this.

GENE leaves. ALEX makes her way to SUPERMAC's office, lets herself in and does the old rubbing-the-pencil-over-the-rubbed-out-writing trick on his diary. The minx.

ALEX:
'Meet Sean Irvine'



Luigi's. GENE and ALEX are at the bar, RAY, SHAZ , VIV and CID at the usual tables.

GENE:
Listen, he's your superior. You don't sneak into his office and start reading his private diary.

ALEX:
Could he be bent?

GENE:
No, he could not!

ALEX:
Well why did he rub out the meeting with Sean then?

GENE:
That's proof of nothing.

ALEX:
Maybe, maybe not. Why don't we ask him?

The door slams and CHRIS enters, wearing police uniform, helmet and all. He walks straight to SHAZ and nods to LUIGI - evidently a signal.

LUIGI:
Eh.

LUIGI goes to change the music from light opera.

VIV:
Hello.

RAY:
Chris, what the bloody hell are you playing at?

MUSIC: 'You Sexy Thing' by Hot Chocolate.

CHRIS:
I'm arresting you on suspicion of being the loveliest woman I've ever met.

SHAZ:
What are you talking about?

CHRIS removes his helmet and then starts to remove, well, everything else.

RAY:
What are you doing?

GENE:
What is he doing?

ALEX:
He's being attractively post-modern.

Sounds of horror and disgust from CID.

ALEX:
Hey, Chris! The full monty. Them's the rules.

SHAZ is part horrified, part delighted.

VIV:
Nah, he's not...

CID:
Chris, what you doing?

VIV:
Chris...

GENE turns away to concentrate on less appalling things.

GENE:
Bottom line is, I trust Mac.

ALEX:
He said things were black and white. What if he's black?

GENE:
If Mac had anything to do with Sean Irvine's death, then everything that I believe in is wrong.

ALEX:
Welcome to my world.

CID are yelling 'no', groaning and laughing at CHRIS.

RAY:
He's gone mad.

VIV:
That is horrible.

LUIGI:
(rolling his eyes heavenwards) Sorry, mama. You had such great hopes for me.

LUIGI goes to answer the telephone, while CHRIS reaches his big finale - to groans and more shouts of 'no' from CID.

RAY:
No. No. No. No!

GENE:
Oh, dear God.

ALEX laughs. CHRIS leans forward to kiss SHAZ, kecks round his ankles - and falls over. CID laugh. LUIGI proffers the telephone to GENE.

LUIGI:
Mr Hunt. Is for you.

GENE:
Well tell them to piss off. I'm drinking.

LUIGI:
He said to say it's Mac.

GENE takes the phone.



A knock on the door of SUPERMAC's office.

SUPERMAC:
Come in.

GENE enters...

SUPERMAC:
Gene.

...followed by ALEX.

SUPERMAC:
(less enthusiastically) And DI Drake. Nasty business. I wanted to thank you both for clearing it up.

ALEX:
That's if it is cleared up.

GENE:
Yeah, it seems that Sean Irvine came to see you on the day that he died.

SUPERMAC:
Irvine? I don't think so.

ALEX:
It was in his diary. A diary someone was very keen to get hold of.

SUPERMAC:
He must be mistaken.

ALEX:
It was in your diary too.

SUPERMAC:
How can you possibly know that? My diary's kept under lock and key.

ALEX:
I picked the lock and read it.

SUPERMAC:
Did you now?

GENE:
She did have her reasons.

SUPERMAC:
I think we'd better clear up this misunderstanding at once, don't you, Gene? Scotch?

SUPERMAC goes to pour the drinks.

SUPERMAC:
And you, DI Drake. You put your pretty little fingers near my private belongings again, I'll cut them off. Shut the door, Gene.

GENE opens the door for ALEX, who goes out, turns round and has it shut in her face. Oh dear.



ALEX's flat. She's watching television.

MARGARET THATCHER on the TV:
I'm talking very quietly about succeeding, in a very quiet, I hope British, way.

ALEX changes channels. The telephone rings.

ALEX:
Hello.

The television has footage of the Prince and Princess of Wales on some sort of State visit.

MARTIN SUMMERS on the telephone:
Did you like the flower?

ALEX looks round and sees a single red rose lying on top of the 'fridge.

ALEX:
How did you get in?

MARTIN SUMMERS on the telephone:
Are you going to be my partner, or my enemy?

ALEX:
I'm putting this phone down.

MARTIN SUMMERS on the telephone:
Pont de l'Alma. Still haven't got it, have you? I was there at the funeral. Holding back the grieving hordes?

ALEX sees Diana on the television and the penny drops.

ALEX:
Pont de l'Alma. It's the tunnel where she died.

MARTIN SUMMERS on the telephone:
Do you remember where you were the day she crashed?

ALEX:
But that was 1997.

MARTIN SUMMERS on the telephone:
More than a decade without her.

ALEX:
But she hasn't died yet! This is 1982!

MARTIN SUMMERS on the telephone:
Isn't it just.

MUSIC: 'Mirror Man' by The Human League

ALEX puts down the phone and looks around fearfully (as you would) then at the single red rose.

# Ooo-ooo. Ooo-ooo. Ahhh. #

Credits.

# Ooo-ooo. Ooo-ooo.
# The water shines
# A pebble skips across the face
# A dozen times, then disappears
# Not a trace left behind... #